2004: A Look Back

With the coming of the New Year, it’s time again to gaze into the Berea Online crystal ball to see how our city will fare in the coming year. Here are some of the highlights:

January: The city closed a deal with Berea College to acquire the community’s utilities system. Residents were shocked, however, when city officials announced that Berea Utilities would be converted to run entirely on natural gas. Under a hastily passed municipal ordinance, all homes in city limits had to be converted to use gas lights, gas stoves, gas fireplaces, and fitted to use new inventions developed exclusively in Berea - gas powered televisions, computers, and video games. In addition, area cemeteries were required to have gas-fueled eternal flames at all gravesites. “I liked the eternal flame concept because it is a wonderful, warm way to remember a loved one,” said Berea city councilman and Delta Gas president Glenn Jennings in a telephone interview from his private island in the Florida Keys. “Believe me when I tell you that it’s really the gift that keeps on giving,”

March 16: City residents were surprised to find that the Christmas tree in College Square was completely bare – devoid of any lights, bells, or other ornaments. College officials acknowledged that un-decorating the town Christmas tree represented a break with a time-honored Berea yuletide tradition: leaving the tree decorated until at least Memorial Day.

May: As part of a push to build a domed stadium to accompany the proposed Berea Convention Center, basketball fans were treated to an exhibition game between the struggling Cleveland Cavaliers (6-19) and some local high school cagers. The event was facilitated by Berea city leaders as part of an effort to lure the NBA franchise into relocating to central Kentucky. The deal fell through, however, after the Lady Pirates edged out the Cavaliers in triple overtime, 54-53.

October: A city meeting called to address Berea’s traffic problems was canceled after the Berea City Council failed to get a quorum for the event. Police later revealed that five of the eight council members slated to attend the meeting had been reported missing. A subsequent investigation revealed the officials were all trapped in Spoon Bread Parade traffic that had formed three weeks before. Representatives of the Berea Fire and Rescue team reported that Councilman Truman Fields was found in desperate straits near his gridlocked car on Ellipse Street. Officials said Fields was reportedly attempting to use tennis balls to spell out the letters S-O-S in the hope of signaling a rescue plane.

December: Street Department Director Tim Taylor resigned in disgust shortly before Christmas, announcing that the city’s solution for dealing with traffic congestion was making his job impossible. Taylor said his department had been forced to replace five street sweepers in a single fiscal year. Officials acknowledged the breakdown of the street sweepers may have been linked to the city’s mandate to force residents to revert to using the horse and buggy instead of cars. Said Taylor, “We can deal with snow, but where are we supposed to put seven tons of horse manure collected from 25 miles of streets and roads?”

Written by Andy McDonald - BereaOnline.com Contributing Editor